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April 07, 2005
3,345th
ok, we've got to move back in time. after years of rightfully claiming i never got sick, the past few months have seen two of the top four worst bouts of illness of my life, the most recent landing me low and/or in bed for the past few days. some have pointed out the strong link to the running thing. point well taken. i think the issue is not so much the running itself, but the fact i'm still ill-prepared for the harder runs.
so, first, let's go back to... sunday... an account mostly written shortly before i passed out, only to wake up to over two days of... well, intestinal issues, among other things. let's just say it was great for weight loss.
oh, how far we've come!
i ran my first capitol 10,000, which is also my first competitive 10K, with friend and teammate katie. katie, of course, kicked ass again, finishing in 55:23.8, which put her, holy crap, 84th in her age group (30-34)! she averaged 8:56 minutes per mile. but i ain't jealous - she just rolls like that.
and me, i kept up with katie for a little over 2 miles, and finished, eventually, and i, it was about, um, 1:02, which, made me... 3,345th overall. i mean, woohoo! apparently, this was good enough to be, um, 394th in my age group. meaning i got beat by a lot of people my age, as well as a lot of older and younger people.
ok, i kid, but i averaged a 9:57, which finally gets me below the cursed 10 minute per mile mark. and that's what this is all about - competing against oneself, not against others.
but the results are on the web, so let's take a look, anyway, and see how i compared...
let's see... um... 45 men over 60 beat me... well, that'll happen, 60 is the new 40...
two men 75-78 were faster... ok, there's always those freaks - good for them... a 78 year-old beat me...
aha! no woman over 65 beat me. what's more, 94 year-old Sidney Smith, a, uh... woman, of Austin totally ate my dust. out of the fast lane, grandma! i got places to be! like, the finish line!
and, hey - 76 year-old Omer Allard traveled all the way from san antonio just to finish a couple of minutes behind me. a couple of minutes? two minutes? why that's long enough to make two nice, soft bowls of quaker one-minute oats for both you and wilford freakin' brimley, Omer. yeah, be careful driving home through the tears of bitter, humiliating defeat, Mr. Al-loser-o!
and, hey, i ain't agist, i was droppin' bitches on both ends of life - like... wait, three nine year-olds beat me? a ten year-old girl? son of a...
ok, let's just fcuking drop it, ok? but mary mccord of bulverde, tx, we may have "tied" this year, but you better buy some faster shoes with that aarp visa card - next year, it's on.
oh, and those kids are totally on 'roids. huge kids. huge, freaky-big noggins.
Posted by Rob at April 7, 2005 12:00 AM